We Both Laughed in Pleasure by Lou Sullivan

There’s almost something comforting about its mundanity, too. As a result, We Laughed in Pleasure has become a Bible of sorts - it’s a glimpse into the life of an average, everyday trans guy navigating life, love, sex and politics in the midst of the AIDS crisis. The horniness is actually pivotal, here - trans guys in porn are still uncommon, which means they’re often desexualized, especially when they’re gay. “The reader really gets to traverse alongside him throughout his whole life.”

“He included everything from desperate loneliness to shameless horniness,” says Mitchell. Across more than 400 pages, Sullivan writes about top surgery, anonymous sex with strangers and piecing together the language for his identity in a world that didn’t yet understand it.

These diaries are gloriously no-holds-barred, but they’re also mundane in a way that trans people so rarely get to be in a world that sensationalizes their existence. We Both Laughed in Pleasure changed everything. Widely considered to be the first publicly gay trans man to medically transition (or at least one of the most visible), he was known as a powerful writer and public speaker, but vast swathes of his personal life remained a mystery. “Nothing has ever hit so close to home.” Another expresses gratitude that the book exists: “Knowing that I’m allowed to live unapologetically as a bi/gay man, that I’m not a ‘new trend’ or ‘intruding’ on gay spaces has allowed me to accept that part of myself more.”Īt face value, We Both Laughed in Pleasure is glimpse into the life of a renowned gay, trans activist - prior to the book’s release, Sullivan was best known as the founder of San Francisco-based FTM International, an organization founded in 1986 to help FTM (female-to-male) trans guys access hormones, peer support and gender confirmation surgeries. “I nearly cried reading about his life,” writes one. There, users gather at least once a month to wax poetic about what the diaries mean to them. Since then, it’s been a near-constant fixture in trans-centric social media groups such as Reddit’s FTM subreddit. In that moment, I felt a strong, unbreakable connection to gay trans history.”Ĭollated and published in 2019, We Both Laughed in Pleasure is a collection of Sullivan’s diaries written between 19, the year he died of AIDS-related complications. “There’s already so little representation for trans guys, so it feels really special to have this first-person account. “When I read Lou’s feelings on navigating the world as a gay trans man, I felt shocked that something could resonate so deeply with me,” they tell me. The first time 28-year-old talk show host Mitch Mitchell read Lou Sullivan’s We Both Laughed in Pleasure, he felt an immediate jolt of self-recognition.

We Both Laughed in Pleasure by Lou Sullivan